Bitch.

:D

2009-07-10T00:38:11Z

Hey EVERYONE IN LA.

http://hq.deviantart.com/blog/25797544/?utm_source=elnino&utm_medium=messagecenter&utm_campaign=elnino-worldtour-losangeles-full&utm_term=link

Anyone wanna go to that? I think it'd be rather fun. :>

...?

2009-06-04T06:28:44Z

Why is the world so weird?

For the peoples who like House.

2009-05-17T09:55:52Z

This is kinda funny. XD

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNoS2BU6bbQ

<3

2009-03-13T23:56:43Z

Happy happy happy.

Ragnarok Online

2009-03-02T12:05:34Z

Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online

8D

I am an internet detective!

2008-08-27T17:38:01Z

You can't fool me!

Nor can you hide!

Ah hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa.

taera @ 2008-06-03T00:00:00

2008-06-03T07:14:27Z

.. Damnit.

This is why I don't like to ever kiss ass or fake shit or lie or whatever. It comes around to bite me in the ass later. I tried too hard and over did it and got too many jobs. One job I had to quit (and I didn't have the guts so I just no showed...) and another job I'm like, no good at .. AT ALL... some how sold myself yet .. I dunno, I've already made some pretty bad mistakes there. I mean it hasn't effected things YET but it will and I dunno how exactly to fix them... I dunno. I'll think of a way. But I mean, I'm gonna have to cut my hours there some more because next quarter I guess, in a month - I'll be getting more hours at the clinic. 8D Yay! I really like my clinic job. It's pretty good. The clinic director showed Chris and I (I work with a dude name Chris lol) how to do super bills. Well, I guess it went over Chris' head so I've been doing them and I'll show him later. Lol. >>; Or will I... buahaha. No, kidding. But yeah.. yay for like, responsibilities. That's what I like, when I have a bunch of stuff to do and the rush to get it all done yet be perfectionist about it.. See, I'd love to tell people THAT but that sounds so full of shit hahaha. But seriously, I love that. And if this job can bring me challenges like the OS did.. oh man. Like bring me the crazy sick mean people! I can handle it! Haha.

Anyway... yay. I just feel like I'm screwing up all kinds at the gamestop place. And it seriously doesn't fucking help when like ... the manager there is telling me "oh use your charm" to sell shit. What the fuck. And like basically flat out says like I should be selling more cuz I'm a girl. See then.. he hired the wrong kind of girl.. I have confidence with people, not with "guys." Like flirting. No. What the fuck. -_-; I know I got hired because they needed to hire a girl.. and because girls can sell to certain people. Well, I can sell the parents. All my sells are parents. It's weird. NOT nerdy boys. >:

Hmm.. I think I thought of something I can do.. I gotta keep reminding myself to do it but it might work... The basic socializing tool. Talk about THEM and THEIR interests, and use their name, like maybe at the register or after doing a preorder or GI. I dunno. Lmao. Cheesy shit, who knows. Might work. "ohai, wut games do you like to play? oh yeah? what's that? so why's it better than...? blahblahblah." That kinda stuff is hard to fake. Cuz like more than likely, I really won't CARE about their interest.. But! 8D I've mastered customer service, maybe next is salesss. :B

But clinic pays me more so imma whore to them first.

..

2004-04-15T04:14:46Z

My life is a fucking waste.

Fuck this world. I'm not living in it any longer.

Happy fun time.

2004-04-13T04:03:32Z

Some guy imed me on AIM. Isn't that great? Insisted his name was Jon and that did not know who anyone was or where anything was... yet knew that I was 18, living in Chicago, and more crap. Sure, if he got that info from LJ, that's fine. But he said it was on the AIM directory. And that's bullshit. Because I have no info there. So he just proceeded to harrass me.. and I showed my friends on IRC what he was saying, and he was calling me a dumbass because he thought I was cloning AIM and talking to him in multiple screen names. Hello asshole, I don't care about you that much to do that.

Beth got particulary mad at me for a stupid reason. She told me what Joe wrote in his journal. I didn't know he updated it. She has his journal linked on her journal, which I view a lot. So I clicked it! OH NO! And I read the entry that talked about me! OH NO!!! Oh! And the entry was practically written to me. "Shannon, I said I Hate you, I don't literally." I don't have a right to read something that is directed towards me? UH OH!? And I commented that I found it funny that he still talks about me. GASP! HOW FUCKING TERRIBLE! Nevermind the fact.. that after Jose had blocked her, changed his AIM names, removed her from his lists on everything, she still went into MY LIVEJOURNAL, and read all his entries. HMMM. Which is worse? She can't do that now because I changed my password. Just like when she went into my e-mail account to read through all my e-mails. I don't -care- if she was suspecious, it's not right. Seriously.

She's allowed to read MY boyfriend's friend's only journal entries in MY livejournal name.. yet, I'm not allowed to look at her boyfriend's public entries one time? Bullshit.

I'm not a bad person anymore. I used to be, but not anymore. So I would love it if everyone stopped trying to make me out to be one. Lots of people expect me to forget the past, yet no one wants to forget mine?! Yeah, thanks a lot.

So my whole attitude right now is: Fuck you World.

Because the World's attitude seems to be: Fuck you Shannon.

.

2004-04-13T00:20:17Z

Everyone stops talking as soon as I say something. And the more I talk, the longer it takes for someone to respond after I'm done.

Something must be horribly wrong with me.

Hm.

2004-04-12T20:33:42Z

Just got back from rehersal. I'm cold and hungry. It's hard to type. I don't really have much else to say.I think Jose left to buy me some fries from Burger King. Yay. Because I know they'll always be good, but it's a fucking gamble to get from McDonald's.

A srugeya

2004-04-12T00:33:58Z

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says.
Closer Property. State whether each statement is true or false. If false, give a

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?
My soda

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
A videogame.

4. WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what the time is.
6:30 p.m.

5. Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?
7:28 p.m. Heh.

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
Dramatic spanish soap music.

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Oh hell I don't remember. It was probably Friday.

8. Before you came to this website, what did you look at?
Gaia... I think? I looked at pictures.

9. What are you wearing?
flannel PJ pants, and a t-shirt (omg K, me too.) plus a sweatshirt.

10. Did you dream last night?
Yes

11. When did you last laugh?
I dunno.. recently?

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Lots of pictures of Jose and his bro as little kids.

13. Seen anything weird lately?
No..

14: What is the word most often used in your vocabulary?
"dunno"

15. What is the last film you saw?
Uhh... I can't remember at all.

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?
A house in Hope Ranch.

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know.
I have the worst headache right now.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
I would make everyone a communist.

19. Do you like to dance?
Yes. A lot.

20. George Bush: is he a power-crazy nut case or someone who is finally doing something that has needed to be done for years?
He's a moron. Ta da.

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Hannah

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
I don't know.

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Sure.

Goddamnit.

2004-04-08T02:54:43Z

Jose's dad is now watching Dreamcatcher. LAMEST MOVIE IN THE WORLD!

Sphinx is fun. I like it.

My updates suck. I should just delete my journal and never bother again.

Slow

2004-04-07T15:43:10Z

Argh.

I'm sick of being sick. :(

I'm making my Easter card right now. XP

I drew a picture of Cleopatra for class. I like it. :\

I wish I could draw well everytime I drew something. But it was only her face... not body. I can't draw bodies. At all...

I failed like.. all my classes.. 'cept two. Maybe 3. I should be okay in Wondo's. Bleh... 4 classes.. not good.

Fast.

2004-04-06T23:44:32Z

My ear fucked up so bad I couldn't balance right and I was sick. I am sick. I didn't go to school, but I went to rehersal.

I get yelled at for not logging on AIM or IRC anymore because I like RO.

Bored. So more RO for me. Unless I can find something better to do that doesn't take energy.

Jose could go cash his check tonight and go buy some games for PS2? But I don't think he feels like it.

Let's.

2004-04-05T01:40:01Z

Break.
Up.
Every.
Word.
And.
Split.
It.
Between.
Every.
One.
There.
Is.

All:
BAM!

It's Halloweeeeeeeeen!

2004-04-04T18:41:54Z

I'm so confused. Argh.

Jose is always tired. Like -always-. It's starting to freak me out.

Talked to my mom this morning. She's really depressed about everything. I feel bad for her. But there's nothing I can do.

My grandma still says she hates Jose which is -dumb-.

I'm bummed because when I go back to Cali for a visit, my grandpa is gonna be there. That sucks ass. I'm always miserable when he's there because -I- have to entertain him. I can't do shit with my friends because he wants to go have dinner at Harry's and shit. I don't like that place.

I like this song a lot. And I don't feel like updating.

Oh yeah, wait. I'm in the school play now. Bang, bang, you're dead. Yay for me... Rehersal is today at 4. So there we go, that's my plan.

DAY.

2004-04-02T01:35:59Z

I touched the new PS2 FIRST. AH HAHAHA. Jose cried. He did. Seriously! FUCK YOU.

Anyway, I did the awesome puzzle part to Devil May Cry 2, but I can't fucking fight the shit. <3 Puzzles for making me feel better about my gamer abilities.

I got some mini oreos from Jose :D I only wanted one. D:

So yes, we have a new ps2. So SPECIAL. He was very happy. His eyes lit up and everything. :o But for some unknown reason, he's letting his bro play. Wtf. His brother broke his old PS.. so whyyyyyy is he letting him play on the new one?! What ever. My contribution to the thing was a whole FIVE dollars. Whoa! So I guess it's Jose's. Not ours.

And I'm going to play RO for the rest of tonight. Bleh. I'm tired. Today was stupid.

Fuck I can't believe it's April again. When I am queen, I will remove April. We'll have some other awesome month name for it instead.

And if you cry and tell me, "My birthday is in April! :O" I'll just tell you that I don't care, and changing the month will unmake your exsistances, so it won't be any problem to you anymore. :D See? Works out good, doesn't it?

Oh yeahz, we also had McDonald's. WHUT?! Yeah, Kag. I'm calling your manager and telling him you ditched work to go try to have sex with Jose. D:

Fools.

2004-04-01T19:41:19Z

I hate this month. I've always hated April. I am so not looking forward to this month. Shitty stuff always happens on this month. Especially last year. But let's not get into that.

Macs are lame. And the people who use them must be too. They actually have the word Mouse and Keyboard written on those items.

It's cold here. And I'm so fucking irritated. You have no idea. Everyone is pissing me off. Some chick walked infront of me, while I was trying to keep up with Jose, so I was behind him.. (we were going down the stairs) and I was so ready to pull her down onto the floor and beat the shit out of her. I don't know why! Everyone is just bugging me SO BADLY. It's like, "Hi Shannon!" *PUNCH* I'm messed up. I keep thinking really really really messed up thoughts. :D Not about me of course, but about what I could do to other people. Like this one guard here... he told Jose to slap me, because I didn't want to take my sweatshirt off since it was cold... Well, I was thinking how it would be cool if when they get older and put into a retirement center.. that I could be the nurse and give them fucked up injections.. Just to mess with them. Because I am -sick- of the adults here treating EVERYONE like shit. Like they are way better than us and shit. It's not cool at all. It just pisses me off so bad. So much injustice around here.. and there's nothing I can do about it. Noooothing.

I can't wait to go home and play RO!

Oh yeah, Jose got the 30 more bucks he needed to go get the BRAND NEW PEE ESSS TWO!!!!!1 I gave him 1/3 of the money he needed. :o My aunt Linda sent me some Easter greetings which = money and chocolate. Man, aunts with major sweet tooths and was a former baker -rules-. Linda used to make cakes and all that.. she still does. But she's a big fan of See's candy (as am I) and she sent me some yummy Chocolate Butter Eggs from See's. Sooo freaking good. Jose really likes See's candy. :o I can't believe I didn't take him there while he was in Cali. Wtf is my problem? Well, when we go back, I'll buy a pound or two of it. :D Yay!

April.

2004-04-01T14:26:05Z

I fucking hate the mornings.

I hate them to HELL.

I hate being pulled out of my warm cozy bed to fucking be in the cold and walk to school. Why the fuck does school have to start so goddamn early anyways? I am dead right now, so like hell I'm going to learn.

Son of a bitch. I am in the worst mood. And you know what? I didn't want to admit it, but I finally did last night.. I'm depressed. Yay.. fucking depressed again. I would kill the fucking President for some Prozac. You don't understand.

Well, here's a fucking survey.

A - Age: 18
B - Band last heard: Hell if I know.. I can't remember shit.
C - Career future: Waitressssss.
D - Dad's name: Joseph. (Joe.. )
E - Easiest person to talk to: Cats.
F - Favorite song: Break by Staind. GASP.
G - Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: Neither...
H - Hometown: Santa Barbara?
I - Instruments: No
J - Job: No
K - Kids: No
L - Longest car ride ever: Trips to Disneyland. :O
M - Mom's name: Laura
N - No. of people you've slept with: 2
O - Oldest sibling: Christine, 22 or something.
P - Phobia[s]: Ehhhh.... Not gonna say.
Q - Quote: "I fucking hate quotes" - Tany
R - Reason to smile: Jose.
S - Song you sang last: Fly Me to the Moon.
T - Time you wake up: TOO FUCKING EARLY.
U - Unknown fact about me: I like to dance... a lot... :o
V - Vegetable you hate: None. I love veggies.
W - Worst habit: Biting my nails and cracking my knuckles. My hands are destroyed.
X - X-rays you've had: A LOT! I don't know. I've had a cat scan and that's it.
Y - Yummy foods: Sushi, Chicken (of any type), and uh... damn. I love Chicken.
Z - Zodiac sign: Capricorn

Hell mmmorning.

2004-03-30T14:22:17Z

I so want to quit the internet. But I won't.

This school rules. They freeze the shit out of this place, and then tell you take your sweatshirt off if it's not white. And then they tell your boyfriend to slap you if you respond with "but it's cold..." Hi, let's be nazis and live in Chicago and deny all the little children warmth.

Thank you for the comments from 2 entries ago. They really meant a lot. :3 They still DO mean a lot.

I got some mail yesterday. A package from my grandma. She gave me a white t shirt from Tostola or something.. and a cute little Chinese fish thing that you hang in your house for good luck. And she also sent a letter that my crazy grandma Mary sent me a while back. It was a pyschotic happy V-day note. Something jumbled with, "It's been so long, are you mad at me? What did I do? I love you and I talk with your sister please reply." When SHE'S the one that moved everywhere, not giving anyone her address. And last time I saw her, she told my dad to go to hell. And she prides herself on my sister. I hardly believe Christine talks to her. And she used to always mention how she took care of me as a baby blah blah. Which meant, give me foods I was allergic too... keep me in a total dump.. stuff like that. She's got 11 other grandchildren, but she doesn't treat them like she treated me, now does she? I remember a lot from my childhood. Like really really young years. It's not pretty. Annnnyyyyyyyywaaaaaay...

I also finally got the letter from Paula. She had sent me a bunch of pictures of wedding dresses she liked and stuff. So I was looking at them, and the mom Jose's mom babysits for was like.. O_o;; So I told her. Thank god she speaks English. XD

I refuse to get married till we have money, a car, a good place to live, good insurance, steady job, and all that jazz!
Everyone hear rushes to get married to their sweetheart. All the couples here beside Jose and me are already engaged or married. I was like WTF? They keep asking Jose and me when we're gonna get married. Uhm hi, I'm only 18, no fucking way am I ready for that yet. I hardly see anyone who married young stay together forever. They struggle like hell. :( I want a family the normal way. No accidents, no surprises.

Oh yeah, Jose's all excited about the PS2 now. He can take it in and for 30 more dollars get a brand new one. In the box and EVERYTHINGOMG. So when he gets his check, he'll do that. And then take me out to a nice fancy dinner at McDonald's! :D

Uh.. that's all.

Well.

2004-03-30T02:15:47Z

She apoligized. Which does mean a lot to me. I just wish her stupidass boyfriend would be more like my stupidass boyfriend and not bother himself with talking to a person he hates.

But! The story continues!

Something happened on RO, I guess. I was randomly taken out of the guild I was in. I don't fucking know. Maybe Jose did it? Maybe it was some weird ass glitch? No clue. So I am walking in Prontera.. and I see Rek say "break smells" or something, just jokingly. So I go over to her and we say hi. She asks why I'm not in a guild. I said I didn't know. She talked about her guild and if I wanted to join, and I said I'll just stay guildless. And then her and this other guy started talking shit about the guild leader of the guild I was in.. And I didn't say anything.. because I've heard her talk about Rek before. And I'll just stay neutral about it all. Even though it pisses me off to hear that stuff about her from Rek.. but I just didn't feel like being hated even more. So they're saying stuff.. and I just say oh.. and mention what was said to me from the guild master. I totally forgot what she told me about leveling a swordie because I was trying to level my archer before. And if you've known me for a long time, you'll know I forget things way too fucking easily. Well! She was sitting there the whole time watching this... and got mad at me for talking to a person that she has a problem with. I don't know. I didn't defend her nor go against her. I just didn't really do anything. Like I always do when a person is talking about someone. But she got mad at that. But seriously, would I betray and hate a person for no reason? A person who I CRIED over when I thought she had died? I don't -cry- over anyone unless they meant something to me.

Whatever. I don't know. But it really fucking sucks.

Sore.

2004-03-29T19:32:15Z

I bit my nails so hard last night.. I don't have much nail left. And it hurts a lot. Lemme just go lick them and swish it around in salt, make it hurt more.

Physical pain > emotional pain.

I'm on a mac right now.

I was very sad last night. Very sad and angry.

Poored my heart out to Jose.. again.. and cried a lot.

This is one thing we can't relate on. He's never had anyone hate him. Everyone loves Jose. Jose is great. No one has anything against Jose. But me? Oooh man. He's never had to hear about someone wanting you dead. -Dead-

Last night, I was talking to a friend of mine.. and she was telling me this story about this guy she used to talk to on the net. She actually saw him in real life the other day. And I just asked if he was cute. Because I was just wondering. Not like it would do any good or bad to know or not.. Just a stupid little question. Well, apparently, if you are in love with a guy, under no circumstances are you allowed to ask your friend of a guy she saw was cute. Even if she isn't or is with someone else. That makes you a -whore- ladies and gentlemen. Her boyfriend bitched me out so bad. And when I wanted to let it slide like always, and said that I wasn't going to talk to him.. he said something like.. yes I am.. and go cut.

That's the classic response. Go cut. Because I'm mad, I'm gonna cut. Is that it? No. I have not cut in months. And the only person that ever drove me to cut was my -mother-. That pissed me off so bad. But he finally let my friend talk to me again.. and she was on his side to. And then said that everything between me and her was my fault.

So lovely?

That was another thing. No one ever defends me. Ever.

Jose has plenty of shit to say about them. But he'll never say it to them, because he doesn't feel like talking to them. Yet it's totally okay for everyone to say their shit to me, tell me how I'm such a whore or a pmsing bitch when I did NOTHING. It's great. Sooo great.

But then, I get told to just forget about it. Like that. Snap of the finger! I lose a friend, "Oh, just forget about it." Because it's -that- easy, right? Yeah.

Anytime I have a problem, no one wants to hear it. I literally have no where to go when something is wrong. No one wants to hear me talk. I'm in class right now and I'm about to fucking cry. Only one more period left.

I still think about dying. Anytime we walk out somewhere at night.. I have the thought in my head that someone will drive by and shoot me. It would only hurt everyone else for a little while. Maybe. But they can just "forget about it." They can move on.

I don't feel good. I haven't in days. I'm constantly arguing with Jose about stupid shit that's always my fault. He is always right. And I am always wrong. I'm sure I'll get bitched at because of this entry.

I'm waiting to go back to Cali to move over there and Jose will tell me that he's not going to go with me. That he's breaking it off and we aren't going to be together. I know he will. Maybe right now he isn't going to think about that but he will. I know that I a person can only put up with me for so long. Dunno how my mom did it. Well yeah I do. She was hardly ever home.

I wanna just keep biting away.. till there's nothing left.

It's a beautiful day... outside...

2004-03-28T19:26:39Z

Everything has been okay. Sorta.

I don't want to lie when writing in here, but sometimes I have to. In part to make myself feel better, and in part to keep the questions away.

I have nothing to do and no where to go. It's boring in this house. It's dark too. They never ever have any lights on.

I hate my aunt. I think she is the one I hate the most. She's 30 something years old, and her mother is still doing everything for her.

She had a job. A real job. And she got fired in 8 days. Big fucking surprise. She still is keeping her cats at my grandma's house. My grandma doesn't want her cat. Because of her cat, my grandma won't take Kitten. She would love to have Kitten, but noooooooo.

There's so many things about Karen (my aunt) that pisses me off so fucking much. But I can't even explain them all. She's the biggest loser/failure in my family. Even more so than me.

Jose bought a PS2 the other day. It's pretty cool. He is disappointed in it though. Because it's used and it's the older model. I dunno. I thought it was fine... He doesn't seem to happy anymore.

Last night I had a dream that I was able to get Prozac again. That my dose was actually raised too, which was good. I really wish I had it again. I also had another dream where I was with my mother and grandma and I wanted something, but I couldn't have it. Something like.. some ice cream I guess. They said no. The way they would say no back when I was a kid.

So my dreams are telling me I'm an unstable kid?

It's 1:30-ish, and I highly doubt we'll be doing anything today. Just another wasted day...

-_-

I'm okay with that, I guess.

Angry.

2004-03-26T18:26:23Z

I am really really fucking pissed.

Most of my donation letters are gone too. Who wants to explain this?

I hate you Kag. You didn't need the gold that badly. You should have fucking told me before just taking it. I don't care that it's gone, I just care that you would do something so fucked up like that and then not even explain yourself.

I hate it here right now.

I feel extremely uncomfertable. I can only stand it when Jose is here, but guess what. He's working.

I feel more fucking anxiety coming up.. and I feel like crying some more.

But I can't even go to bed and lay down because his brother is playing videogames.

Maybe I'll just take a walk and smoke. Stressed out.. so bad.. right now.

Yeah, laters.